I got knocked down (the remix)

Yesterday I wrote a blog about how I was struggling, and I got a lot of support, especially from my twitterati Tina and Ally. However, it became painfully obvious I needed to take a step back and look after my mental health. I really agonized over what to do. Do I carry on regardless and see if I can get to my annual leave or stop and start again now? I knew going sick would screw someone over at work and I really didn't want to do that after everyone's support, but equally, I didn't want to spend the first week of my annual leave in a state, especially as I'm off with my family.
The nurse from my employers sickness contractors (I kid you not) was brilliant and reassuring but I've been feeling incredibly guilty and that nagging anxiety is really doing my head in. Now that's irony, or the type of pun I'd expect from a shit northern comedian.
I've set myself a target of getting back to work before my long weekend, it's both a realistic target and stops my mind telling me that the mess room gossip would be that it's convenient I went off leading in to a long weekend. I have no evidence proving that of course, there's something I've learnt from therapy, but it doesn't stop you assuming the worst in a certain conductor instructor. Shit, is it obvious who I'm talking about?
I'd set myself such a quick return target though because dwelling isn't going to help, I just needed a breather after all. It's important to treat mental health like physical health. If you broke your leg, you wouldn't try and run a marathon 5 months later.
Special thanks must also go to Mrs. G. Supportive as ever, I asked her how I'd been recently. "A bear" came the reply. I imagine she didn't mean rugged and strong, and it just reaffirmed my belief I needed to take a break before I lose the plot completely. I've seen people who have no hope and are full of despair. Still, at least those Ipswich fans get to come to Norwich again soon!
Sorry, I couldn't resist that, my humour will always be a coping mechanism, so remember, next time I'm laughing at you dear reader, it's because I'm coping!
Mrs. G has just asked am I blogging again? That woman deserves a medal.
On the ball city

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